Do as you please, because i will...
La fantasía de un cuento, un sueño o un deseo nunca se comparará a la pura, triste, dura y en ocasiones bellísima realidad, esta es la historia, no como sucedió en realidad, sino de como la recuerdo...

...casino royale...

By Unknown
buena pelicula no como las otras, con varas erroneas y k le faltan, pero me puso a pensar...
el ,mae se convirtio en asesino a sangre fria gracias a k se abrio ante la vieja y ella solo lo utilizó por k lo ocupaba, por no poder ssoportar se odiada (cobarde) se dejo morir...
El dejo lo k era asesino agente con esperanza de salvar lo poco k tenia de alma sin saber (yo si sabia lo presneti) k ella simplemente lo iba a traicionar. Me pregunto... se k no me voy a convertir en asesino y agente para salvar el mundo utilizando bonitos gadgets y varas asi, pero sera k en verdad me encariñe y me senti traicionado? eso me lleva a pensar en otras cosas, tendra un efecto en mi a futuro? la verdad es k peienso en ella, por remalaso o por amor, pero aunk se pudiera dar algo con qualquier posible vieja, no estoy como tener nada con nadie, asta empezar el estudio, ocupo lo k se llama un cooling time, pero veo k es dificil olvidar a kien uno amo, mas de la manera en k sucedio, sintiendo k fue mi culpa y la de ella y la de todos, como si el pasar la sal tuviera algo k ver... como si elmiedo de toparmela fuera suficiente... por k no no svemos desde mucho antes de mucho desde antes de sikiera terminar o de sikiera poder darle akello... pero la veo en mis sueños de ves en cuando, cuando inconcientememnte busco algo familiar en esto tan extraño, en situaciones en lo k paso nunca paso, en otras reclamandole y en otras pidiendole perdon por no ser kien ella keria k fuera (como si eso fuera mi culpa.. aunk lo es asta cierto punto). Pero tampoco hay k ponerlo asi por k el vernos tampoco tiene k ser problematico, puede ser tmbn bonito retomar lo k ha pasado, olvidar y construiur o tmbn simplemente darse cuenta k nah. Lamento como termino, y tal vez algun dia decida escribir lo k paso, o porlomenos como le recure en el momento, ficiendo en k no le fui honesto y en k me falló, y e k simplemente no podia yo seguir. Todo son simples detalles de la vida como la luna de hoy, o el oso igual al mio k tiene mi hermana, o lo k tengo guardado todavia. Sueños son sueños y podemos sonar lo k nos plasca ast ael punto en k podamos por k son casi siempre incontrolables, no hay k sentirse culpable ni mucho menos darles mucha vueltas, pero si son interesantes y aveces es solo k ocupamos alguien con quien compartirlos. Los selos son inevitables, no ya por poseer sino ahora por no sentirse menos, pero denuevo la vida es brutal y bella sol hay k saber aguantar y disfrutar.

estado: escibirndo eso dice mucho


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...doubt...

By Unknown
still inloved
estado: inloved with life


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...deja-vu?...

By Unknown
From Closer:
Room, Dan and Alice.
ALICE: So this man comes into the cafe today, and he says,
"Hey waitress, what are you waiting for?"
DAN: Funny guy.
ALICE: So I go, "I'm waiting for a man to come in here
and fuck me sideways with a beautiful line like that."
DAN: So what did he ask for?
ALICE: He asked for a cup of tea with two sugars.
DAN: Mmm.
ALICE: I'm waiting for you.
DAN: To do what?
ALICE: Leave me.
DAN: I'm not going to leave you! I totally love you, what is this?
ALICE: Please let me come. I want to be there for you. Are you ashamed of me?
DAN: Of course not. I told you, I want to be alone.
ALICE: Why?
DAN: To grieve. To think.
ALICE: I love you. Why won't you let me?
DAN: It's only a weekend.
ALICE: Why won't you let me love you?
---------------------------------------------------
Dan and Alice are dressed up and attending Alice's exhibition.
Alice leaves Dan and heads over to her picture. The doctor walks up.
LARRY: Like it?
ALICE: No.
LARRY: What were you so sad about?
LICE: Life.
LARRY: What's that then?
Alice laughs.
LARRY: So what do you reckon, in general?
ALICE: You want to talk about art?
LARRY: I know it's vulgar to discuss the work at the opening of the work,
but somebody's gotta do it.
LARRY: I'm serious. What do you think?
ALICE: It's a lie. It's a bunch of sad strangers photographed beautifully,
and all the glittering assholes who appreciate art say
it's beautiful 'cause that's what they want to see.
But the people in the photos are sad, and alone,
but the pictures make the world seem beautiful.
So the exhibition's reassuring, which makes it a lie,
and everyone loves a big fat lie.
LARRY: I'm the big fat lie's boyfriend.
-----------------------------------------------
Back in the gallery
ANNA: I haven't even seen you for a year.
DAN: Yes you have.
ANNA: (exasperated) Only because you stalk me outside of my studio.
[Possible reference to Conspiracy Theory... was it in the play?]
DAN: I don't stalk. I lurk, and when I'm not there you look for me.
ANNA: How do you know if you're not there?
DAN: Because I am there, lurking from a distance.
Dan looks at the Doctor across the room.
DAN: Look at me. Tell me you're in love with me.
ANNA: I'm not in love with you.
DAN: You just lied.
He starts to leave.
--------------------------------------------
LARRY: I had a chat with young Alice.
ANNA: Fancy her?
LARRY: Of course. Not as much as you.
ANNA: Why not?
LARRY: You're a woman. She's a girl.
She has the moronic beauty of youth, but she's sly.
ANNA: She seems open to me.
LARRY: Yeah, that's how she wants to seem.
You forget you're dealing with a clinical observer of the human carnivore.
ANNA: Am I now?
LARRY: Oh, yes.
ANNA: Mmm. You seem more like the cat that got the cream.
Stop licking yourself.
LARRY: That's the nastiest thing you've ever said to me.
ANNA: It's horrible. I'm sorry. Oh, I'm so sorry.
ALICE: I'm going.
DAN: I'm sorry.
ALICE: Irrelevant. What are you sorry for?
DAN: Everything.
ALICE: Why didn't you tell me before?
DAN: Cowardice.
ALICE: Is it because she's successful?
DAN: No, it's because she doesn't need me.
ALICE: Did you bring her here?
DAN: Yes.
ALICE: Didn't she get married?
DAN: She stopped seeing me.
ALICE: Was that when we went to the country
to celebrate our third anniversary?
Did you phone her, beg her to come back?
when you went for lovely walks?
DAN: Yes.
ALICE: You're a piece of shit.
DAN: Deception is brutal. I'm not pretending otherwise.
ALICE: How? How does it work? How do you do this to someone?
Dan tries to think of an excuse.
ALICE: Not good enough.
DAN: I fell in love with her, Alice.
ALICE: Oh, as if you had no choice?
There's a moment, there's always a moment,
"I can do this, I can give in to this, or I can resist it."
And I don't know when your moment was, but I bet you there was one.
I'm gone.
Dan blocks her exit.
DAN: It's not safe out there.
ALICE: Oh, and it's safe in here?
DAN: What about your things?
ALICE: I don't need "things."
DAN: Where will you go?
ALICE: Disappear.
ALICE: Can I still see you?
ALICE: Dan, can I still see you? Answer me.
DAN: I can't see you. If I see you, I'll never leave you.
ALICE: What will you do if I find someone else?
DAN: Be jealous.
ALICE: You still fancy me?
DAN: Of course.
ALICE: You're lying. I've been you. Will you hold me?
He holds Alice, who's now crying.
ALICE: I amuse you but I bore you.
DAN: No. No.
ALICE: You did love me?
DAN: I'll always love you. I hate hurting you.
ALICE: Why are you?
DAN: Because I'm selfish.
And I think I'll be happier with her.
ALICE: You won't. You'll miss me.
No one will ever love you as much as I do. Why isn't love enough?
ALICE: I'm the one who leaves.
I'm supposed to leave you. I'm the one who leaves.
She starts kissing him.
ALICE: Make some tea, buster.
He goes off to make tea, then looks back after a short while.
She's not there; he runs after her, out to the street, but she's gone.
-------------------------------------------------
time jump
Dan arrives home. Alice is sleeping on his couch.
ALICE: Where have you been?
DAN: Work thing. Had a drink with Harry.
You never have one drink with Harry.
ALICE: You know he's in love with you.
DAN: No he's not. Is he?
ALICE: Did you eat? I'll make you something.
DAN: I'm not hungry.
ALICE: What?
DAN: This will hurt.
DAN: I've been with Anna.
I'm in love with her.
We've been seeing each other for a year.
It began at her opening.
Alice gets up and walks past him.
They kiss and hug.
DAN: I'm your stranger. Jump.
------------------------------------------
at Anna's
ANNA: Why are you dressed?
LARRY: Because I think you might be about to leave me
I didn't want to be wearing a dressing gown.
LARRY: I slept with someone in New York. A whore. I'm sorry.
ANNA: Why did you tell me?
LARRY: I couldn't lie to you.
ANNA: Why not?
LARRY: Because I love you.
ANNA: It's fine.
LARRY: Really? Why?
He's confused.
LARRY: Something's wrong. Tell me.
LARRY: Are you leaving me?
Anna nods.
LARRY: Because of this? Why?
ANNA: Dan.
LARRY: Cupid? He's our joke.
ANNA: I love him.
LARRY: You're seeing him now?
Anna nods.
LARRY: Since when?
ANNA: Since my opening last year.
Covering her mouth...
ANNA: I'm disgusting.
LARRY: You're phenomenal. You're so clever.
Why did you marry me?
ANNA: I stopped seeing him. I wanted us to work.
LARRY: Why did you tell me you wanted children?
ANNA: Because I did.
LARRY: And now you want children with him?
ANNA: Yes... I don't know.
LARRY: But... we're happy. Aren't we.
She glares at him.
LARRY: You're going to go and live with him?
ANNA: You stay here if you want.
LARRY: Oh, look. I don't give a fuck about the spoils.
You know, you did this to me the day we met.
You let me hang myself for your amusement.
Why didn't you just tell me the moment I walked through the door?
ANNA: I was scared.
LARRY: You're a coward, you spoiled bitch.
LARRY: Are you dressed 'cause you thought I might hit you?
LARRY: What do you think I am?
ANNA: I've been hit before.
LARRY: Not by me!
LARRY: Is he a good fuck?
ANNA: Don't do this.
LARRY: Just answer the question. Is he good?
ANNA: Yes.
LARRY: Better than me?
ANNA: Different.
LARRY: Better?
ANNA: Gentler.
LARRY: What does that mean?
ANNA: You know what it means.
LARRY: Tell me.
ANNA: No.
LARRY: I treat you like a whore.
ANNA: Sometimes.
LARRY: Why would that be?
ANNA: I'm sorry you're a...
LARRY: Don't say it. Don't you fucking say "You're too good for me."
I am, but don't say it. You're making the mistake of your life.
You're leaving me because you believe that you don't deserve happiness,
but you do, Anna.
LARRY: Did you have a bath because you had sex with him?
So you wouldn't smell of him. So you'd feel less guilty?
LARRY: How do you feel?
ANNA: Guilty.
LARRY: Did you ever love me?
ANNA: Yes.
He starts crying. She embraces him.
---
Cut to Dan's. He walks back into his apartment,
alone and miserable, and shuts the door.
---
Cut back to Anna's...
LARRY: Did you do it here?
ANNA: No.
LARRY: Why not?
ANNA: Do you wish we did?
LARRY: Just tell me the truth.
ANNA: Yes, we did it here.
LARRY: Where?
Anna points.
ANNA: There.
LARRY: On this. We had our first fuck on this. Did you think of me?
LARRY: When? When did you do it here?
LARRY: Answer the question!
ANNA: This evening.
LARRY: Did you cum?
ANNA: Why are you doing this?
LARRY: 'cause I want to know.
ANNA: First he went down on me, and then we fucked.
LARRY: Who was where?
ANNA: I was on top, then he fucked me from behind.
LARRY: And that's when you came the second time.
ANNA: Why is the sex so important?
LARRY: Because I'm a fucking caveman!
LARRY: Did you touch yourself while he fucked you?
ANNA: Yes.
LARRY: You wank for him.
ANNA: Sometimes.
LARRY: And he does.
ANNA: We do everything that people who have sex do!
LARRY: You enjoy sucking him off.
ANNA: Yes!
LARRY: You like his cock.
ANNA: I love his cock!
LARRY: You like him cumming in your face.
ANNA: Yes!
LARRY: What does it taste like?
ANNA: It tastes like you but sweeter!
LARRY: That's the spirit. Thank you. Thank you for your honesty.
Now fuck off and die, you fucked up slag.

---
Time Jump
---
At the Rennaisance Hotel
Dan's lying on the bed in a robe.
ALICE: Shoe me the sneer.
ALICE: Beautiful!
DAN: You'll wake up the hotel.
Alice jumps on him.
ALICE: Fuck me.
DAN: Again? We have to get up at six.
ALICE: How can one man be so endlessly disappointing?
DAN: That's my charm.
ALICE: Mmm.
DAN: So, where are we going?
ALICE: My treat.
DAN: Where are we going?
ALICE: My holiday surprise. My rules.
Dan starts tickling her, and she laughs hysterically
DAN: Where are we going?
ALICE: New York! New York!
DAN: Oh, you angel.
DAN: You did remember to pack my passport.
ALICE: Of course. It's with my passport.
DAN: And where's that?
ALICE: In a place where you can't look. No one sees my passport picture.
ALICE: Mmm.. when we get on the plane, we'll have been together four years.
DAN: What about the gap?
ALICE: You mean trial separation? It didn't work out. Happy anniversary.
DAN: I'm going to take my eyes out.
He gets up.
They start recalling their first time together at the hospital.
DAN: What was in my sandwiches?
ALICE: Tuna.
ALICE: How many stiches did I get?
DAN: Two, but you should have had three.
DAN: What was your euphemism?
ALICE: "Disarming." Too easy, buster! Next?
DAN: That park, who'd I go there with?
ALICE: Your father.
ALICE: Were the chairs in the hospital grey or blue?
DAN: No idea.
ALICE: Trick question. They were green.
DAN: You are a trick question.
ALICE: How come we never took a vacation?
DAN: We went to the country.
ALICE: Doesn't count. You were off making sneaky phone calls to that witch we do not mention.
ALICE: Come to bed.
DAN: I need a smoke. How'd you manage to give up?
ALICE: Deep inner strength.
He gets back on the bed.
DAN: Why me? You could have chosen anyone. Why me?
ALICE: Because you cut off your crust.
He laughs and starts hissing her stomach.
ALICE: And this. Mmm.
DAN: When are you going to stop stripping?
ALICE: Soon.
DAN: You're addicted to it.
ALICE: No I'm not. Paid for this.
DAN: Tell me what happened.
ALICE (playfully): Nothing happened.
DAN: He went to the club.
ALICE: Lots of men came to the club. You came to the club.
(Flashback to the club, with Alice dancing on a pole)
ALICE: The look on your face.
DAN: The look on your face.
DAN: What a face. What a wig.
DAN: I saw this face. This vision. When you stepped into the ???. It was the moment of my life.
ALICE: This is the moment of your life.
DAN: You were perfect.
ALICE: I still am.
DAN: On the way to the hospital, I kissed your forehead.
ALICE: You brute.
DAN: The cabby saw me kissing you, said, "Is she yours?"
DAN: I said, "Yes, she's mine." She's mine.
DAN: So, he came to the club, watched you strip. You had a little chat, and that was it.
ALICE: Yes.
DAN: You're not trusting me. I'm in love with you. You're safe. You had every right, I just want to know.
ALICE: Why?
DAN: Because I want to know everything. Because I'm a lunatic. Tell me.
ALICE: Nothing happened. You were living with someone else.
DAN: What are you justifying?
ALICE: I'm just justifying anything. I'm just saying.
DAN: What are you saying?
ALICE: I'm not saying anything.
DAN: I just want the truth.
ALICE: Where are you going?
DAN: Cigarettes.
ALICE: Everywhere is closed.
DAN: I'll go to the terminal. When I get back, please tell me the truth.
ALICE: Why?
DAN: Because I'm adicted to it. Because without it, we're animals. Trust me.
Dan leaves. Alice looks conflicted.
---
Dan comes back down the hall, steals a rose from outside another room. He walks in and offers her the rose.
ALICE: I don't love you anymore.
DAN: Since when?
ALICE: Now. Just now. I don't want to lie. Can't tell the truth, so it's over.
DAN: It doesn't matter. I love you. None of it matters.
ALICE: Too late. I don't love you anymore. Goodbye.
ALICE: Here's the truth, so now you can hate me. Larry fucked me all night. I enjoyed it. I came. I prefer you. Now go.
DAN: I knew that. He told me.
ALICE: You knew?!
DAN: I needed to hear it from you.
ALICE: Why?
DAN: Because he might have been lying. I had to hear it from you.
ALICE: I would never have told you, because I know you would have never forgived me.
DAN: I would. I have.
ALICE: Why did he tell you?
DAN: Because he's a bastard.
ALICE: How could he?
DAN: Because he wanted this to happen.
ALICE (getting angry): But why test me?
DAN: Because I'm an idiot.
ALICE: Yes. I would have loved you... forever. Now, please go.
DAN: Don't do this, Alice. Please, talk to me.
ALICE: I am talking. Fuck off.
DAN: I'm sorry. You misunderstand! I didn't mean to.
ALICE: Yes you did.
DAN: I love you!
ALICE: Where?!
DAN: What?!
ALICE: Show me! Where is this love? I... I can't see it, I can't touch it. I can't feel it. I can hear it. I can hear some words, but I can't do anything with your easy words. Whatever you say is too late.
DAN: Please, don't do this!
ALICE: Done.
ALICE: Now, please go, or I'll call security.
DAN: No, you're not in a strip club, there is no security.
Alice picks up the phone. He goes over and grabs it from her.
DAN: Why did you fuck him?
ALICE: I wanted to.
DAN: Why?
ALICE: I desired him.
DAN: Why?
ALICE: You weren't there!
DAN (getting upset): Why him?
ALICE: He asked me nicely.
DAN: You're a liar.
ALICE: So?
DAN (screaming): Who are you?!
ALICE (crying): I'm no one!
Alice spits in his face. Dan thinks about hitting her, and it's obvious.
ALICE: Go on, hit me. It's what you want. Hit me, fucker.
Dan slaps her, hard.
U.S. customs, and JFK International Airport.
Alice hands the Customs officer her passport. Her names is Jane Rachel Jones, born 1980-01-12 in New York
CUSTOMS: Welcome back, Ms. Jones.
JANE: Thank you.


....y asi de la nada se acabo.
estado: concordando


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..we are the youth of the nation...

By Unknown


Despues de ver una pelicula por accidente, que ya habia medio visto antes, solo el final creo, me puse a pensar en mucha vara de la que el director presento. Era de tiroteos escolares, presentados fragmentadamente en historias paralelas sobre distintos alumnos y sus simples insignificantes vidas pero que llevan al que la vea a medio relasionarse con almenos uno, incluso los del tiroteo, seguro en una tecnica cinematografica para poder generar simpatia o codecendencia en el que la ve. leega a ciertos momentos a ser grotescay que lleva a dudar sobre si enrealidad es realiad o mera exageracion o como diria el director "resaltacion"artistica de ciertos rasgos caracteristicos de los personajes.

Presenta viejas adolecentes obsesionadas por vanalidades (todos tuvimos compaeras asi) pero las lleva al colmo de ir a vomitar de amnera vulimica simultanea en trio enel baño. La vulimia es una realidad y el asumir que ella spor ser vanales lo eran, no ayuda, y mucho menos va a suceder que algunos de los muertos en los que se halla basado esa pelicula vengan a quejarse por como "resaltaron"sus rasgos. ese fue el principio,

Luego presentaron tmbn a la joven timida insegura de si misma en cierto sentido presentada fea (no existen acaso inseguras bonitas?) como no le gusta el deporte por lo que las demas vijas le dicen, donde ayuda y se mete en solo el estudio y los libros y como luego muere tras un disparo en hombro en la misma libreria donde pasa lo poco de miserable vida que tenia (todos tmbn conocemos de estas, pero que putas quiere decir esa escena?)

Estan por supuesto los amigos de los que disparan, que de una u otra manera son los decentes en la pelicula, ellos sobreviven, se les perdona la vida, no debido a bondadez, playada o amistad, simplemente se le dice, jalen por k algo cerdo va a pasar, si no se van, mueren en el "juego".

Digo juego por que asi es como la pelicula terjiverza el punto de dispararle a los companeros de clase. Si una lo piensa se va a encontrar que el meollo del asunto, como putas esplicar lo que pasa en los tiroteos en estados unidos alemania y otros paises? Aqui es cuando se caen en errores fatales, sobreseguirdad que lleva al enojo del estudiantado, los planes de control de armas que ayudan solo al gobierno, los impuestos para programas que no van aresolver el asunto y menos prevenir que suceda, y porsupesto el problema de simplemente culpar al ambiente de los jovenes que lo hicieron. Se habrio la polemica de losvideojuegos, y ensenan como juegan 1stpersonshooter games, o como ven a hitler por el history channel, como si esos fueran factores determinantes.

Claro es facil culpar despues de ver. Aqui es cuando algo intresante resalta de la pelicula, el hecho que uno dellos fuera talentoso en el piano y mucho mas, era un artsita con futuro, pero claro se presenta como algo que asentua no mas el poder de creatividad que los llevo a disparar. El otro mae si estaba trastornado mentalmente con resentimientos (segun la pelicula donde le dispara al profe por no escucharlo cuando se quejo de k los demas lo molestaban) El otro especimen si es el k uso para mi teoria,aunque como son personaes muy fictisios basados en simples percepciones del guinista y director, no se deberia siquiera hablar de esto, pero ya que eso me llevo a reflexionar, voy a dar mi teoria de como putas (wtf) gente puede hacerlo, llegando mas alla del simplemente culpar a videohuegos, canales, internet, pistolas o ambiente familiar.

Bueo alguna vez han pensado en que simplemente les va a valer meirda algo? bueno ese es el titulo de esta pag. asi que supongo que en cierta medida lo entenderan. El ejmplo del mae que disparo que era pianista, es para resaltar que en un profile de ascesino eso no encajaria, el director lo utilizo de manera distinta para que tuviera sentido,pero yo digo que no, era artista pero simplemente le valia, le valia a un punto mas alto de lo que a m me puede valer mandar a comer mierda a alguien con quien estuve jugando o al amor de mi vida que simpleemnte decido dejar. Le valio al mae lo que pasaba despues si disparaba y mataba a mas de 50 personas, por k? como? muy simple, es facil que nos valga mierda algo, dificil es decidirlo, pero aun asi es una linea muy leve, que puede ser cruzada en ambas direcciones, pudo arrepentirse pero no, por k le valio tmbn, es facil solo hay que decidirlo, pero quien putas vva a decidir al levantarse por la manana que va a coger un arma poner explosivos y matar a cuantos pueda antes de lo detengan? Ahi mi siguiente punto, se trata de numeros, de porcentajes de 6 biloones de habitantes en el mundo minimo unos 4 cada 2 anos van a decidir que les va a valer lo que la sociedad considera como malo, (por k si pregunto que hay de malo en fumar? - por k da cancer! - por k es malo el cancer? - por k mata - por k es malo morir? ... por k se deja de existir? err rno hay respuesta. malo o bueno es percepcion, algunas perosnas pueden, del monton que hay, escojer una distinta) Asi que no es como lo ponen los medios o peliculas y my punto con este post larguisimo es k no me gusto la pelicula por como estereotipo a los jovenes, desde las bulimicas asta los asesinos.



estado: technodancing


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...700s...

By Unknown
No soy asi, no lo pienso ser, lo pude ser por flashes momentaneos, pero decido que no. Asi empezé, siendo quien deseo ser, quien puedo llegar a ser, mas que quien sea en realidad. Decidi hacerlo bien y voy a cumplirme a mi. Nunca fue por caridad, fue por voluntad y realización personal, asi que voy a dejar de lado semejante berrinche, no pienso caer denuevo en el juego de manipulación, lo viví hace mucho con varias personas y nunca resulto bien a la larga, no vale la pena y tampoco lo es el rencor o resentimiento. Se puede decir simplemente que fue una pelicula, pero como sabemos, existe el reprise, quien sabe si se dará denuevo, pero asta entonces me quedo con mi 700's simbólico, mi 700's que es mas bien 300's mios, 200's de mi antiguo yo 100 de mi futuro ser y 100 de ella. lo que quiera aveces no importa pero se que no deseo ser denuevo quien calla por callar, quien dice por decir y quien pretende mas de lo que da a conocer. Un numero definio todo, desde un posible rencor asta la satisfactoria esperanza de superación, y asi mismo el mojorar como persona, ahora que? medicina? Info? arq? Civil? comunicación colectiva? quien sabe... bueno yo se pero dejesmolo en el "fog of war".

estado: en paz


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...alternative realities...

By Unknown
Es increible, como empezamos nuestars vidas, las vivimos a diario pasando por experiencias increibles y dejamos de lado 0pciones y tomamos otras, nos encamonan por rutas y siempre igual, todo siempre encontrandonos defrente con momentos decisivos, momentos que definen el futuro, quienes somos y quines vamos a ser, avecees por las deciciones por tomar o por simple consequiencias fuera de nuestro control.

Hasta ese momento las dos realidades existenciales por venir son completamente factibles, podemos exister en cualquiera podemos ir por una u otra y lo unico que nos inclinara hacia cualquiera es aquello a lo que somos impotentes, algunos le dicen destino otros casualidad, yo le llamo fluctuaciones y lo unico que podemos hacer es jugar un poco con las posibilidades.

Y asi se lanza la moneda al aire, a partir de toque en el suelo, apartir de que la gota sale del vaso, apartir de que ponemos un pie en el suelo delante de nosotros, apartir del presente+1sec, ambas realidades se vuelve excluyentes, una de ellas se vuelve definitva asta la proxima vez que se tira la moneda y la otra realidad, nuestra otra posible vida y existencia, queda solo como una posibilidad inexplorada, una inexistentte e inerte, pero con tanto impacto como la que se esta por vivir. Podremos preguntarnos que pudo haber sido pero solo estariamos ignorando y tartando de posponer el ver que la moneda calló defenitivamente y sin importar cuantas veces la tiremos de nuevo nunca podremos reproducir el resultado original, y no es tanto el resultado lo que deseamos es volver al momento que la tiramos lo que deseamos, y ese es tmbn sinigual.


Y asi podremos ser parte de distintos mundos, muchas personas pudimos ser y muchas disitintas seremos, todas aquellas posibles seguiran ahi, definidas solo por el momento anterior, el momento.

estado: con dolor de espalda

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...dönner...

By Unknown
Un Turco que cocinaba dönner, muy ricas, como al que ibamos cuando estabamos en berlin, esos eran buenos tiempos de fiesta y salidas amigos y despiche, de ambiente y conocer, mas k por la gente por el lugar. El turco de aki, k hacia donner, no tan buenas o economicas como alla, dejando de lado el hecho de k al ebrio asta la chankleta le sabe riko, pero de un pronto desaparecio y no mas pudimos aprovechar de su delicia medio oriental (sera la traduccion correcta para medio oriente).



Pero apenas hicimos la nota de k desaparecio, el capitalismo salio a flote, todos dijeron, seguro le fue mal en el negocio, seguro se paso de lugar po k no ganaba plata o seguro se puso un burger king, ahi me di cuenta que era muy extrano k lo uniko en k pudiermos pensar fuera en que kebro el negocio, pork en el capitalismo en que vivimos no podemos concebir el echo de k a alguien que le valla bien en un negocio cierre por k le fue bien y decida k ha ganado suficiente, pues por su naturaleza voraz, es logico k siguiera en la codicia por ganar mas con el negocio. Asi k pensamos k el tmbn callo ante la codicia de otros negocios de comido rapida, pero asi y asi seguira siendo, mas ahora k el tlc fue electo popularmente por el pueblo, al elegir a un 73% de los legisladores k lo aprueban, y a un 23% k no, cuando se derrame la leche k no se keje nadie, cuando lo turcos y el casado sean cosa del pasado solo voy a decir una cosa, "no me interesa! me puedo ir del pais cuando me de la gana, pero me kedo para verlos sufrir."

estado: lleno


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...i fly so high and fall so low...

By Unknown

If I was beautiful
If I had the time
They'd flock to me
Bathe me in the wine
I know that's not the way
I know that's not how things are to be

I was always looking
and I held until the time began
SUBTLE THINGS COME AT ME
I look to see where loss had ran
I can have the sun it come
And touch me on my shoulder
Think of all the things that I could
Wish that i had told her

I fly so high
Then fall so low

(I fly so high, I fly so high)

If I was beautiful
If I had the time
You would flock to me
And bathe me in the wine
I know that's not the way
I know that's not how things are to be

If I was like you
With nothing to get around
Then everything would be beautiful
As far as I can see
You'd be sitting here with me
'Till love's end

I fly so high
Then fall so low

I fly so high
Then fall so low

Signs of love (I fly so high)
Away we could run (then fall so low)

I can see the light come peering through the sky in my mind
CRAZY PEOPLE COME AND LOOK AT US WE'RE LYING ON THE FLOOR
I would hold you in my arms until we both are home
I would hold you in my arms until we both are old

estado: Happy


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...F.E.A.R...

By Unknown

Uno puede preguntarse que hacer....

irme y que no me guste o quedareme y arrepentirme?
amar y salir herido o no arriesgarse y ser infeliz?
estudiar lo que deje dinero sin que meguste, o lo que quiero y morirme de hambre?
recordar pensando no haberlo superado o seguir adelante y creer que no importó?
intentarlo denuevo aunque no funcione o olvidarlo y preguntarse si hubiera sido distinto?
descanso un rato con riesgo de dejar pasar el momento o,
me esfuerzo con riesgo a encontrar solo cereal al otro lado del arcoiris?


...y darce cuenta que nunca se va a poder estar 100% seguro de que todo va a salir bien, pero por eso no vamos a dejar de vivir, las deciciones son mas faciles cuando nos demos cuenta de que no importa cual escojamos, siempre hubiera existido una forma de estar mejor, y mil ptras de estar peor. Solo queda decidir sin miedo.

estado: As I wake I'm going out of my mind


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...igriega...

By Unknown
Cuando se sabe que se quiere en la vida pero no se tiene valor para conseguirlo, que hacemos? o cuando sabemos que queremos pero sabemos que hay que recorrer un camino alterno antes de poder tenerlo, lo tomamos? aunque ese camino signifique el alejarnos de nuestro camino deseado? Bueno sentirnos solos es necesario aveces pero que tal si los requisitos para salir satisfactioriamente de una etapa anterior son muy violentos? muy distintos? son muy antagonicos? que tal si para amar a alguien hay que dejarlo libre?
que tal si para determinar nuestro futuro hay que simplemente preguntar "ahora que?" Que tal si esa pregunta es facil pero la respuesta puede ser tan devastadora como un un beso compartido?



Que tal si nuestro amor sonado es quien nos complementa pero no se puede estar juuntos? que tal si todo estuviera simplemente hecho apra que no sirva?

Seria entonces todo lo que nos pasa o sentimos pura invenciion nuestra? Seria una ilucion irreal debido a como vemos la realidad? Se convertiria esa ilucione en algo malo? o empezarian otros a verlo como algo malo para uno?

Seria esa pregunta un arma de doble filo? si o no, sin grises, sin intermedios ...? Nos conformariamos con algun intermedio si existeria? seria sano mentalmete hacerlo?

Sera el fin de todo con un no? o simplemente el inicio de otro fin?
No sabemos asta que suceda e incluso depsues seria dificil entenderlo.

Entonces que? aceptamos k es necesario el camino dificil para llegar al k deseamos? apesar de k sea un gran riesgo? pues no nos keda de otra o si? tal vez abrirnos paso por la maleza asta regresar a uestro camino.

estado: triste

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...little idiot...

By Unknown
Despues de darme cuenta k asta gente como Moby, que pueden llevar vida de farandula, les gusta la simplicidad de la vida, gozando de situaciones especiales sin ser muy elaboradas, invito a quien quiera a que kean el blog del mae en http://www.moby.com/journal es muy interesante ver como la vida puede llegar a ser igual de facinante para un belga como para un tico ao como para cualquiera de ustedes. La foto es de un personaje que el mismo diseno con empeño llamdao littleidiot, voy a ver si puedo integrar varias ideas como el blog de fotos y volver a reintegrar la musica k al parecer paso a mejor vida. Bueno los invito! los invito! - con voz de matarrita.

estado: decidido al cambio


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...make me a perfect lie...

By Unknown


Make me beautiful
Make me beautiful
A perfect soul
A perfect mind
A perfect face
A perfect lie
Make me beautiful
Make me beautiful
A perfect soul
A perfect mind
A perfect face
A perfect...
A perfect soul
A perfect mind
A perfect face
A perfect lie

estado: tranquis

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...selbstmanipulation...

By Unknown
Hasta que punto somos victimas de nosotros mismos? Si me levanto un dia encuentrando que la cama ya no esta caliente, que la mañana ha transcurrido sin mi y que mi deseo de remover las sabanas sobre mi no pasa de ser una simple imagen mental, sere capaz de quitar la cabeza de la almohada? Creemos que la vida sigue despues de cada noche, pero a la mañana siguiente deseamos descnasar un dia, y otro y otro llegando al punto en que no nos acordamos del dia que decidimos acostarnos. Nuestros deseos subconcientes, aquello que deseamos y o nos atrevemos a obtener, aquello que nos lleva de la mediocridad a la vida, aquel sentimiento que viene y va como una bolla a la deriva, esos son motivos que nos llevan a hacer lo impensable. Sermeos lo suficientemente fuertes como para decir "ya basta"? tendremos el valor para cabmbiar lo que no nos atrevemos a cambiar por miedo al mismo cambio? o sera que ocupamos jugar con nostors mismos para obligarnos a hacerlo? No es lo mismo manipular a alguien a hacer lo que uno quiere, pues alli los dos gozan, y obtienen lo que quieren, por lo menos asta que uno se arte del otro por k las cosas no pasan de eso, pura manipulacion. Ella es un obejto, un instrumento que utilizamos para obtener lo que queremos y no somos capaces de obtener por medios tradicionales. Nos convenceremos a nosotros mismos con mentiras piadosas para hacer aquello k no creemos imposible? nos diremos k sera lo mejor sabiendo que es solo una justificacion para hacer desaperecer el miedo? O sera que despues de saber las implicaciones de nuestros actos, tratamos de que suceda sin culpa? sin sentimiento de culpa que nos haga arrepentirnos? nos mentiremos a nosotros mismos para ser felices? sera mejor vivir una mentira creada por nosotros en vez de una realidad que no este bajo nuestro conttrol? Pues el problema nace cuando hay daño colateral, no vivimos aislados, terceros salen lastimados al uno manipularse uno mismo, pero si es cierto que una mueca hoy puede cambiar nuestra vida drasticamente, sonrian y hagan feo, por que es hora de actuar, solo haganlo concientemente, hay consecuencias, y no hay vuelta atras, lo que se perdio se perdio y solo lo que se haga ahora vale, pues el pasado no cambia el presente, ya que yace petrificado para toda la eternidad.
estado: shock

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...Butterfly Effect...

By Unknown
Ya paso mas de un año desde que escribi por ultima vez, no fue un post bonito, pero tampoco lo fue la experiencia, piesno que ese dia tamara no era el problema en ese momento las deciciopnespudieron cambiar quien soy hoy, pero tambien a quien he conocido,... valdira la pena? no se pero hoy, ... Esto lo esplica mejor:
Even one small change, action, word, nod or smile, could set into motion a change of events that can alter the world as we currently know it. So lets look at an example of a trivial event that no one would even notice or think about. The concept of chaos:
"The flapping of a single butterfly's wing today produces a tiny change in the state of the atmosphere. Over a period of time, what the atmosphere actually does diverges from what it would have done. So, in a month's time, a tornado that would have devasted the Indonesian coast doesn't happen...."

By the way it relates to Einstein's famous quote that "God does not play dice with the universe". In other words, Einstein's contention is that events do not happen randomly. There is a reason why events happen the way they do. We may not understand the reason why and may never understand why.
The main point I'm trying to make is that even the smallest most insignificant event has the potential to change your life and those around you. When you think about the events that have occurred thus far in your life how many really big life altering events have occurred? Chances are your life and your reality are shaped by miniscule changes from moment to moment, hour to hour and day to day. By being in the now you will be in a receptive state that allows you to recognize defining moments in your life and take appropriate action or not. If your preoccupied with thoughts other than those which empower you then your emotions may unintentionally manifest into a reality that you never intended.
It's important to remember that what you don't do or say can have just as big of an impact on manifesting your reality as what you do or say.
happy with where you currently are in life. Just know that your life can change if you choose to change. Be open to opinions, ideas and what others are saying. Don't go through life with blinders on. Remember, we all perceive reality a little differently.
The true or objective reality may be entirely different then what you perceive. By experiencing life from a different perspective it may lead you to a new discovery or way of thinking.Reach out to others to the extend that you can. It doesn't have to be big. A smile will do. A few thoughtful but sincere words at the right time are nice also. Sometimes just listening is all that's required. People often just want to be heard. They want to know that somebody gives a damn.
Don't judge and don't offer an opinion unless it's appropriate to do so.Remain as objective as possible and don't get involved in other people's problems. There are two basic types of problems in this world. Yours and mine. You can't effectively help anyone else until you have helped yourself first and you do that by controlling your thoughts.
First of all realize you are unique. No two people live exactly the same lives. You share common interests and activities with others but what you do each day and how you live your life is unique. the only time that really matters is... right now. The answer lies with the present! Focus on the here and now by being in the moment.
Asi que esperen lo inesperado por que voy a hacer una mueca.

estado: decidido

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